Children With Disabilities Invited to ‘The Table’ at Confirmation Mass

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David and Heather Stanghellini adopted Anna Bai Yun when she was 12 years old, and from their first moments together they knew their daughter was something exceptional. After seeing her new parents pray before meals just a few times, Anna, who has hearing and cognitive impairments, sat waiting at the table before the next meal with her hands folded in prayer.

It was a complete surprise to her parents. “She understood our posturing and knew that it was something important from day two,” recalled her mother, proudly and joyfully, in an interview with CNY.

Anna, now 16, is one of three girls adopted from China by the couple, who are parishioners of Our Lady of Sorrows parish in White Plains. The others are Rina, 10, and Nuala, 8. Although younger than Anna, the two sisters had completed their first Holy Communion and first penance with, or before, their older sister.

They were on hand as well to see Anna receive her Confirmation May 10 at St. Patrick’s Cathedral, where she was one of 47 children with disabilities to receive the sacrament on Mother’s Day, during the main Sunday Mass at 10:15 a.m.

The annual sacramental ceremony was sponsored, as always, by the archdiocesan Catechetical Office, with Cardinal Dolan as the principal celebrant and homilist. The event was organized under the direction of Linda Sgammato, director of early childhood and special religious education. Those confirmed were between 12 and 20 years old.

The Confirmation, Ms. Sgammato said, “is a witness to all those who attend (the Mass) that we are a Church that reflects the God of inclusion and everyone is invited to be at the table.

“It sends a message to the families that their children are important to us and that we celebrate them and the gifts that they bring to the Church, particularly here in the Archdiocese of New York,” she added. “It is a great comfort to the families who know that their child will receive the blessings and grace that the sacrament of Confirmation confers.”

That was something important to the Stanghellini family.

The fact that Anna was the first of her sisters to receive the sacrament was a new experience for her. “It’s making her feel very special,” Mrs. Stanghellini said. Her sisters were, however, involved in the ceremony; Rina was an altar server and Nuala brought up the offertory gifts.

“The wonderful thing is the people in our church love our girls and have made it a welcoming place for Anna,” said Mrs. Stanghellini. And Anna knows that Sundays are for Mass. She wakes up and gets dressed, her mother said, and waits for the family with a knowing look in her eyes.

In order to prepare for the ceremony, Anna studied books and reviewed an app that showed an actual confirmation.

In organizing the ceremony, Ms. Sgammato of the Catechetical Office, who has two deaf brothers, visited the Stanghellini family at home, as is her practice. She does that, she said, in order to spend time with the families and explain the details of the day and the important roles of the catechetical and cathedral staff.

“What always moves me is the devotion of the parents, and their desire to have this child participate in the sacramental life of the Church,” Ms. Sgammato said.

Mrs. Stanghellini said Anna likes the fact that the sacramental ceremony is something special at church. When she is excited, she laughs and smiles a lot, which has been the norm when the subject of Confirmation has come up. That was especially true when her red robe arrived at the house.

She chose Mary as her daughter’s Confirmation name, explaining that she and her husband originally gave her the English name Anna after St. Ann, mother of the Virgin Mary. “She’s had a few surgeries over the past few years and we thought that she could need another mother (Mary) to watch over her,” she said.

Mrs. Stanghellini hopes the word spreads that children with disabilities may receive the sacraments. She said, “I’m so glad this is something we can participate in. A lot of times you don’t know that there are other families sitting in the pews who have special needs.”

“It’s lovely to know we can celebrate this sacrament with other kids, another community, and share this faith with people who know what it is like.”